Just chillin’ at work…

Trying my new Windows Media Player Blogging Plug-in. It works!

[Listening to: What Up Gangsta? - 50 Cent - Get Rich Or Die Tryin (02:58)]

From the files of the spam I’ve recently started receiving at my work email address!

Subject: A Week At The Gym

WEEK AT THE GYM: ONE MAN’S STORY
If you read this without laughing out load,
there is something wrong with you. This is dedicated to everyone who ever attempted to get into a regular workout routine.

Dear Diary,
For my fortieth birthday this year, my wife (the dear) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me. Although I am still in great shape since playing on my college football team 25 yrs ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try.

Called the club and made my reservation with a personal trainer named Belinda, who identified herself as a 26 yr old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swimwear. My wife seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress.

MONDAY:
Started my day at 6:00am.
Tough to get out of bed, but it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Belinda waiting for me. She was something of a Greek goddess - with blonde hair, dancing eyes and a dazzling white smile. Woo Hoo!!!!! Belinda gave me a tour and showed me the machines. She took my pulse after 5 minutes on the treadmill. She was alarmed that my pulse was so fast, but I attributed it to standing next to her in her Lycra aerobics outfit. I enjoyed watching the skillful way in which she conducted her aerobics class after my workout today. Very inspiring, Belinda was encouraging as I did my sit-ups, although my gut was already aching from holding it in the whole time she was around. This is going to be a FANTASTIC week!!

TUESDAY:
I drank a whole pot of coffee, but I
finally made it out the door. Belinda made me lie on my back and push a heavy iron bar into the air, and then she put weights on it! My legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made the full mile. Belinda’s rewarding smile made it all worthwhile. I feel GREAT!! It’s a whole new life for me.

WEDNESDAY:
The only way I can brush my teeth is
by laying on the toothbrush on the counter and moving my mouth back and forth over it. I believe I have a hernia in both pectorals. Driving was OK as long as I didn’t try to steer or stop. I parked on top of a GEO in the club parking lot. Belinda was impatient with me, insisting that my screams bothered other club members. Her voice is a little too perky for early in the morning and when she scolds, she gets this nasally whine that is VERY annoying. My chest hurts when I got on the treadmill, so Belinda put me on the stair monster. Why the hell would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity rendered obsolete by elevators? Belinda told me it would help me get in shape and enjoy life. She said some other shit too.

THURSDAY:
Belinda was waiting for me with her vampire-like
teeth exposed as her thin, cruel lips were pulled back in a full snarl. I couldn’t help being a half an hour late; it took me that long to tie my shoes. Belinda took me to work out with dumbbells. When she was not looking, I ran and hid in the men’s room. She sent Lars to find me, then, as punishment, put me on the rowing machine - which I sank.

FRIDAY:
I hate that bitch Belinda more than any human being
has ever hated any other human being in the history of the world. Stupid, skinny, anemic little cheerleader. If there were a part of my body I could move without unbearable pain, I would beat her with it. Belinda wanted me to work on my triceps. I don’t have any triceps! And if you don’t want dents in the floor, don’t hand me the &%#(#&**!!@@ Barbells or anything that weighs more than a sandwich. (Which I am sure you learned in the sadist school you attended and graduated magna cum laude from.) The treadmill flung me off and I landed on a health and nutrition teacher. Why couldn’t it have been someone softer, like the drama coach or the choir director?

SATURDAY:
Belinda left a message on my answering machine
in her grating, shrilly voice wondering why I did not show up today. Just hearing her made me want to smash the machine with my planner. However, I lacked the strength to even use the TV remote and ended up catching eleven straight hours of the Weather Channel.

SUNDAY:
I’m having the Church van pick me up for services today so I can go and thank GOD that this week is over. I will also pray that next year, my wife (the bitch), will choose a gift for me that is fun - like a root canal or a vasectomy.

I thought this was awesome!

Mountains

Click above to see a beautiful panoramic shot of the mountains!

YIPPEE!!! I bet a few bucks on the Carolina Panthers and they COVERED! I actually wanted them to win, but I’m happy.

I also found out that my buddy, JT$, bought me a few Super Bowl squares for my birthday! Well, I had 0-0 and won the first quarter! $100 for me! Yipee!! Thanks, BORING TEAMS (through the 1st quarter).

What a f*ckin’ awesome weekend we just had in Colorado! We just had the 3 best days of snowboarding we’ve ever had!!!

Sean took us to Loveland, which is, by far, the best place we’ve ever had the chance to ride so far in our 4 year snowboarding career! We’ve been to other places, like Steamboat (our first destination out West), Breckenridge, and Copper (went this year and 2 years ago)…nothing compared to how “quiet” Loveland was. The entire top of the place was fresh powder. Every time we went up top, it was a brand new experience. No ice… a few rocks and trees (which made it fun…made it “real”).

Awesome. Simply. AMAZING!

Thanks, Sean, for setting this all up!

We also had some good QT with Mike and Amy, who we barely see. It seems like we see them as much out west as we do while they’re living here… hmmmmmmm…..

Also got to hang out with Carlo, Jason, Sean, and Chad. We had a frickin’ RIOT in that condo, and out on the town (Breckenridge, mainly)! Thanks to all y’all for the great weekend! I gotta hit the slopes again, soon! None of this Pine Knob and other garbage that’s around here, either!

Oh yeah… here are some photos of our weekend! You’ll find some video clips in there, too!

How exciting is this stuff? I can’t wait to try it. Maybe it’ll make me “cool”.

EDIT: My friend, Scott, informed me that this is Nelly’s new drink!

Berry berry interesting!

And I was always under the impression that 1080i was the SHIZNIT!!! So I guess I CAN get a huge plasma TV that does 1024x768 and need feel “slighted”. :D

Read this. It will explain how surround sound works and goes through some of the various implementations of it.

So I was playing around on Atom Films today and found some funny videos.

Annoying Little Kid!

Little Ninjai – Yes, Ninjai.

Thanks Denny!

Denny, Me, and Michelle

Dan, Steve, Michelle, April (+1), and Me!

It was a damn good time. I forgot to bring my camera which sucks because there are no photos, but is also cool because I didn’t have to worry about taking a bunch of pictures like I normally do.

Anyway, we got a bunch of snow that day, making the commute to Camp Ticonderoga a mess. I decided to go right there from the salon instead of trying to make it home and back. I got there at about 6:20pm and hung out with our waitress for the night and drank two or three cups of coffee. I had a headache and needed the caffeine and the pick-me-up. Anyway, the night was hit! A handful of people didn’t make it due to either the weather or not finding babysitters, including my mom. She was sad. I told her not to worry about it. I got to hang out with my mom and dad on Saturday… so all was well there. Besides…stinky bars aren’t good for my mom and dad. I want to protect them from that stuff!

The Ad – from MoveOn.org

Wanna Buy an Aircraft Carrier?

Of all the calls, notes, cards, etc… Dan really came through for my birfday… he’s got me on the floor…dying over here! I’m so damn touched.

Birthday Wish From Dan <— Made in Flash